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Caregiver Relief
Using Services in Your Community
Sometimes caregivers need to ask the older person to consider receiving services from within the community. Outside services may be beneficial not only to your loved one, but also to you. By setting limits, prioritizing, and not becoming overwhelmed, you may be able to continue in your role as a successful caregiver without experiencing burnout. You might say, "I wish I could do your grocery shopping, but I'm feeling overextended."
Offering Alternatives
Then offer alternatives for getting the task done. In this case, suggest services which could help with grocery shopping. Or, if you just can't continue to visit as frequently, explain to the older person how it is affecting you, and how receiving other help in the home would reduce the stress you may feel. Explain, "I know you don't think you need a Lifeline Emergency Response System (ERS), but I worry about you being alone and not being able to get help if you fall down. Please accept the ERS because I won't worry about you so much."
Remember, even if the older person resists accepting outside services, that doesn't mean you have to continue providing the assistance. In fact, they have no incentive to find an alternative if they know you will continue to do everything for them. If you explain that you will no longer be able to do certain things for them, time without your help may make them more receptive to outside services.
Costs May Be a Barrier
Cost may be a barrier for many people. Some older people are still using the 1940 Standard Price Index. They need to know how much "not having" the service may cost in terms of maintaining their independence. When a person is low-income, you may want to investigate public assistance programs offered through the Department of Social Services, known as DSS. These benefit programs include the Block Grant, Food Stamps, and Medical Assistance.
Giving Your Loved One Control
Give the older person as much control in the decision-making process as they are capable of handling. This will increase their acceptance and their willingness to cooperate. Explain that accepting some help now could possibly allow them to live independently longer. Point out the negative consequence of not getting the needed services. But keep in mind, their beliefs may be different then yours. For instance, one common belief found among elders is to not ask for help- financial or otherwise. "If you can't get your own need met, you do without." Their independence needs to be respected as long as their actions do not jeopardize their health or safety.
Barriers to Service
When you look at the barriers to service, make sure that some of those barriers are not your own. Caregivers sometimes have difficulty admitting they can no longer provide all the help their loved one needs. Asking yourself these questions will help you decide whether some of these barriers can be attributed to your feelings about asking for help.
Posted July 22nd, 2007
Sometimes caregivers need to ask the older person to consider receiving services from within the community. Outside services may be beneficial not only to your loved one, but also to you. By setting limits, prioritizing, and not becoming overwhelmed, you may be able to continue in your role as a successful caregiver without experiencing burnout. You might say, "I wish I could do your grocery shopping, but I'm feeling overextended."
Offering Alternatives
Then offer alternatives for getting the task done. In this case, suggest services which could help with grocery shopping. Or, if you just can't continue to visit as frequently, explain to the older person how it is affecting you, and how receiving other help in the home would reduce the stress you may feel. Explain, "I know you don't think you need a Lifeline Emergency Response System (ERS), but I worry about you being alone and not being able to get help if you fall down. Please accept the ERS because I won't worry about you so much."
Remember, even if the older person resists accepting outside services, that doesn't mean you have to continue providing the assistance. In fact, they have no incentive to find an alternative if they know you will continue to do everything for them. If you explain that you will no longer be able to do certain things for them, time without your help may make them more receptive to outside services.
Costs May Be a Barrier
Cost may be a barrier for many people. Some older people are still using the 1940 Standard Price Index. They need to know how much "not having" the service may cost in terms of maintaining their independence. When a person is low-income, you may want to investigate public assistance programs offered through the Department of Social Services, known as DSS. These benefit programs include the Block Grant, Food Stamps, and Medical Assistance.
Giving Your Loved One Control
Give the older person as much control in the decision-making process as they are capable of handling. This will increase their acceptance and their willingness to cooperate. Explain that accepting some help now could possibly allow them to live independently longer. Point out the negative consequence of not getting the needed services. But keep in mind, their beliefs may be different then yours. For instance, one common belief found among elders is to not ask for help- financial or otherwise. "If you can't get your own need met, you do without." Their independence needs to be respected as long as their actions do not jeopardize their health or safety.
Barriers to Service
When you look at the barriers to service, make sure that some of those barriers are not your own. Caregivers sometimes have difficulty admitting they can no longer provide all the help their loved one needs. Asking yourself these questions will help you decide whether some of these barriers can be attributed to your feelings about asking for help.
- Do you feel guilty when you consider calling an agency to ask for help?
- Have you noticed your personal resources are being depleted?
- Are you spending most of your time caring for your loved one
- Are other family members encouraging you to get help?
- Are you concerned about the cost of formal services?
If you can answer "yes" to any of these questions, why not pick up your phone and call LIFE (Lincoln Information for the Elderly)? (800) 247-0938 toll-free or (402) 441-7070. A caring and knowledgeable professional is ready to help you sort through your options and help you access the service(s) you and your loved one desire to use.
Written by Lincoln LIFE Office
