What To Do When Outside Help is Necessary

Most caregivers function with little or no help from human service agencies until a crisis occurs. The caregiver may then be forced to contact an agency with an urgent need for help and may not be thinking clearly because of the feelings associated with a desperate situation. No caregiver can do it all. While it may be frustrating figuring out which agency to call and when, it is a sign of strength on the part of the caregiver to plan ahead by learning what services and resources are available. When the time comes when they alone can no longer provide the total care required by their loved one, the caregiver will be prepared.

It is important to contact a human service agency that has caring professionals skilled at helping to make an accurate assessment of what is needed and to discuss the various options available. Area Agencies on Aging (AAA) are located throughout the United States. They are usually listed in the telephone directory white pages by name, and may also be found by subject (aging) in the Human Services Directory pages toward the back in some telephone directories. The AAA can provide information about what assistance is available locally.

The following suggestions may clarify your situation and help the exchange of information to go smoothly:

• Describe the current situation and your needs as clearly as possible. Offer to make an appointment to come to their office.
• Find out if you should bring anything with you, such as a social security number, proof of income, etc.
• Ask questions and take notes during the conversation.
• Don't apologize for asking for services. Be polite, but firm.
• Get the information you need even if you need to have it repeated several times. Do not rush.
• Ask for written materials about the agency and available services.
• Complete forms or applications while you are there.
• Ask about fees and try to get an explanation in writing.
• What can you expect to happen and in what time frame?
• Get the name of the person(s) who will assist you and a phone number. Always ask for that person when you contact the agency again.
• Call back if nothing happens within the time frame you were given.
• Be patient. Most of these agencies are working with a lot of people at the same time.
  

You will need patience and persistence to navigate the human services system. Try to block out time periods to make telephone calls and appointments so you can minimize the amount of time spent on these activities. Dealing with the bureaucracy can be stressful, so reward yourself for the accomplishments made to understand the system and obtain services for your loved one.

Caregivers may be asked to help make plans for the future based on changes in the way their loved one handles day-to-day activities. Evaluating the needs of the older person can help the caregiver decide what to do. Having this information clearly in mind during an assessment with a professional will help the service organization in providing the best options. Questions about the following may be asked.

• Has your loved one had a recent physical examination? Is there a diagnosis/prognosis? What physical or mental changes can be expected?
• Can your loved one handle the activities of daily living (ADLs) such as: dressing, toileting, using the telephone, preparing meals, doing household chores, managing medications, handling financial affairs, and getting around the house safely?
• Is the present living arrangement appropriate? Are there ways to make it safer for the older person? If you must consider relocation, what are the options?
• Does your loved one have a support system? Who are members of the support system and how does your loved one relate to each of these individuals? What are these individuals willing to contribute to the care of the loved one?
• How does the older person feel about their present situation?
• What spiritual beliefs are important to your loved one? Do they belong to a religious group, and can they attend services?
• What are the older person's income, assets, and expenses? Will they need financial assistance to take care of their needs? Is the older person competent to handle financial affairs? If not, what legal steps must be taken to protect him or her?
  

Having this information will help to clearly set goals.

Excerpted from the "Family Ties" series written by Aging Services-LIFE (Lincoln Information for the Elderly).